Emotional intelligence activity
Anti-Bullying Champions
Make a paper Kindness Chain — one link for every kind thing you do or say! See how long the chain can grow this week.
Materials and setup
- paper
- markers
- paper for chains
- tape or stapler
- pencil
How this changes by age
Pre-K (ages 3–4)
Make a paper Kindness Chain — one link for every kind thing you do or say! See how long the chain can grow this week.
Steps
- Read an age-appropriate picture book about kindness and being a good friend.
- Practice kind words: 'Please,' 'Thank you,' 'Can I play too?' 'Are you okay?'
- Role play: someone is playing alone. What can you say? ('Would you like to play with me?')
- Talk about unkind words: they can hurt feelings like crumpled paper. (Crumple a paper, then try to smooth it out. The wrinkles stay.)
- Make a 'Kindness Chain': draw or write one kind act on each paper link. How long can your chain get this week?
Learning objectives
- Use kind words and inclusive language
- Practice including others in play activities
- Understand that mean words cause lasting hurt
Kindergarten (ages 5–6)
Learn what unkind behavior is and what it isn't. Practice 'upstander' behavior — AND learn what to do when YOU hurt someone else's feelings. Making amends is harder than being a hero, and just as important.
Steps
- Talk about unkind behavior: it's when someone is mean ON PURPOSE, over and over, and the person being hurt can't easily stop it.
- Distinguish: a one-time argument is NOT the same — being mean over and over is a pattern of hurtful behavior.
- Learn 3 roles: the person being mean, the person being hurt, and the bystander. Introduce a 4th: UPSTANDER (someone who helps).
- Practice upstander phrases: 'That's not nice,' 'Hey, come play with us,' 'I'm going to tell a teacher.'
- Role play 3 scenarios: practice being an upstander in each one.
- TALK ABOUT THE OTHER SIDE: sometimes YOU might hurt someone's feelings — by accident or because you were upset. When that happens: (1) Say sorry and mean it (look them in the eye). (2) Say what you'll do differently next time. (3) Try to make it right (give them a turn, share, let them choose first).
- Practice the 3 amends steps with a parent. Even if the other person doesn't forgive you right away, you did the brave thing.
- Create an 'Upstander Promise' with 3 things you'll do if you see someone being mean to another kid AND a 'When I Mess Up' card with the 3 amends steps.
Learning objectives
- Recognize unkind behavior and tell it apart from a normal one-time disagreement
- Identify bystander vs. upstander roles
- Practice upstander behaviors through role play
- Make amends when you hurt someone else: sincere apology, plan to change, repair action
Early elementary (ages 6–8)
Study bullying types, effects, and response strategies. Develop empathy for targets — AND learn the harder skill: making amends when YOU hurt someone. Making amends is harder than being a hero, and just as important.
Steps
- Study types of bullying: physical (hitting), verbal (name-calling), social (excluding), and cyberbullying (online meanness).
- Discuss the effects of bullying: on the target (sadness, fear, loneliness), the bully (isolation, discipline), and bystanders (guilt, anxiety).
- Learn the 'Stop, Walk, Talk' strategy: tell them to stop, walk away, talk to a trusted adult.
- Write empathy scenarios: 'How would you feel if...' for 5 different bullying situations.
- Design an anti-bullying poster or campaign for your home, school, or community.
- Practice assertiveness: stand tall, look them in the eye, use a firm voice, and say 'Stop. I don't like that.'
- THE HARDER SKILL: sometimes YOU hurt someone — by accident or because you were upset. Learn the 3-step amends process: (1) Say sorry and mean it (look them in the eye). (2) Explain what you'll do differently next time. (3) Try to make it right (give them a turn, share, let them choose first).
- Think of one time you hurt someone's feelings recently. Practice the 3 steps with a parent. Then go do them for real if you can.
- Reflect: even if they don't forgive you right away, you did the brave thing. Making amends is harder than being a hero — and just as important.
Learning objectives
- Identify the four types of bullying
- Apply the 'Stop, Walk, Talk' response strategy
- Create anti-bullying advocacy materials
- Take responsibility and make amends after hurting someone, even without immediate forgiveness
Upper elementary (ages 8–10)
Analyze the psychology of bullying, develop leadership in creating inclusive environments, and study restorative justice approaches.
Steps
- Study why people bully: insecurity, desire for power, lack of empathy, peer pressure. Understanding 'why' helps us address it.
- Research restorative justice: instead of just punishment, it brings everyone together to understand harm and repair relationships. How is this different from traditional punishment?
- Analyze a case study of a bullying situation. Map all the people involved, their perspectives, and what contributed to the problem.
- Design an inclusive environment: what policies, practices, and culture changes prevent bullying? Create a specific plan.
- Develop a peer mediation process: how could students help resolve conflicts before they become bullying?
- Write and deliver a speech about creating kindness in your community. Include specific actions everyone can take.
Learning objectives
- Analyze the root causes and psychology of bullying behavior
- Evaluate restorative justice approaches to conflict resolution
- Design comprehensive strategies for creating inclusive environments
Safety and evidence note
Read the full activity before beginning. An adult should supervise tools, heat, food, outdoor work, movement, and experiments as appropriate. Completion records that the activity was done; the child’s explanation, work sample, photo, or demonstration is stronger evidence of learning than a completion check alone.
Related emotional intelligence activities
Active Listening Challenge
Practice being a super listener! Learn to look at the speaker, keep your body still, and show you heard them by repeating back what they said.
Conflict Resolution Toolbox (Sibling & Friend)
Learn to solve small, everyday problems with ONE sibling or ONE friend — the person right in front of you. Practice taking turns, sharing, and using words when you're upset.
Digital Citizenship
Learn how to be kind when using screens AND how to handle hearing 'no.' You want the tablet. You ask nicely. Sometimes a parent says no. Big feelings are real — and learning to wait is a real superpower.
Empathy Builders
Learn to recognize feelings in yourself and others. Practice caring about how others feel by reading faces and sharing comfort.